Today I understood how alone I am. beside I don't know what should I do, because if I try hard for something, at the end I face to a problem, and if I don't try to do anything, I  have nothing.
No organization have not any coordinate with each other it caused really serious problems! I actually didn't made any problems, but because of the lawlessness, it makes me some many disasters. no one can help me and I am really alone in whole of my life. I feel terrible.

I'm interested in this poem, " Hafez "
it's very nice:

In this crusade,
I’ll leap in the air, as a quill light–
burning, like a tad of molten rock,
till the spring of the sun.

In this quest,
I shall dive head first,
striding despite your slit throat–
going on bleeding, as-if a reed-pen,
till the shore-line of this yen.
Translation: Maryam Dilmaghani, Septmeber 2012, Halifax

به هواداري او ذره صفت رقصكنان
تا لب چشمهء خورشيد درخشان بروم

در ره او چو قلم گر به سرم بايد رفت
با دل زخمكش و ديدهء گريان بروم

A: Hey Shadi I have a bad news for you, very bad news.

B: what is that?

A: you are going to have an injection just tomorrow, :D hahahaha khekhekhekhe

B: :O what?! an injection?      in    jec   tion?  i   n   j  e   c ......

( Heart failure )

There was a book store near our apartment, which had very good, useful and beneficial books. today I went there to buy a new book and all books were on sale, because they bust and wanted to sell their shop to another one for being a fast food!!!!!!!!!!
oh my god, I can't believe that! how it's possible, a book store changed to a fast food?! what was the reason?! so it means that most people are interested in eating more than reading?! or what? that's awful... I'm crazy now! completely mad! I just hope their f...king fast food convert to a dust bin!

I was so wild today!!! All the time i just looked for a chance to have
quarrel with all people around me.
I had fight with 2 of my friends, my sister, my mother, my cousin, taxi driver, bus driver and myself actually for no reason!
I don't know why, but the fact is that wasn't my fault, because i was so nervous. I know it seems like an excuse, and it's not a sensible reason for what I did.
Shame on me...

it's 2 weeks a man about forty,  tries to give me some gifts for no reason! I don't know him and what is his goal.
I refused to accepted those, but he persist. I have never seen him in any classes in university, in work, or in any other places! he said his name is Reza. I don't know him but he knows me better than I myself know. Today he wore black clothes from up to down. I mean his shirt, his coat, his pants, his shoes and even his socks. it seemed he just came back from funeral but with a big smile on his lips!

    
     I have a lot work to do but the problem is I can't decide what should I do first, and which activity is more important to put it first in the list.
It really made me dizzy and these days I'm sleeping more than ever.
I'm so worry about next week.

     Today my niece " Hilda " is sick.
It's so weird cause she was good just some hours ago. she had vomiting and very high fever.
I'm very worry about her because she was sick 5 times just in 2 mounts.
Doctors can nothing, none of them, I don't know they are doctors or it's just a formalities name for them.